#184: Satellite of Lunch

Arthur Trope Presents: The Inscrutables

No. 184

“Satellite of Lunch”

Here we have the first result of Slothrop’s new directive on globalization. The initial panel was based on Syd’s tendency to disappear after lunch to watch American Ninja Warrior on TiVO. So that’s how Artie drew it up & he used one of the dozens of turtle sketches he had in his notebook from the Vancouver Aquarium trip, where he had some kind of mind-meld with Schoona the Giant Green Sea Turtle. Thematically, it’s of a piece w #140 where Artie imagines spacious accommodations inside turtle shells, where they live Oscar the Grouch-style with all the trappings one would expect in a luxury condo. (Or maybe more like the TARDIS in Dr. Who for those of you in the UK.) So the Committee took up the globalization challenge & Patel made the suggestion that we just change “American Ninja Warrior” to “soccer”, bc what’s more global than soccer? But soccer doesn’t really play in the US, so Krenshaw suggested we just say “football” and then (North) Americans could assume it means American football & everyone else could assume it means the footie. All in all, it was one of the more efficient Committee meetings, and the panel went on to do fairly well in the focus groups w an S-MCSS score of 18.0. The focus groups are made up almost entirely of middle-class stay-at-home moms in their late 30’s from the greater Seattle area, so there are changes coming with the new global directive. Slothrop has dictated a complete overhaul to bring in more “global people” & diverse perspectives, so termination notices are being sent to 70% of the current group & the recruiting team is looking for candidates based on a long list of geographic/socioeconomic criteria. So that’s what that’s about, if you get an email. The pay is decent for part-time work, but it doesn’t come with benefits. -Ed.