Ty McGraw (Not Canon)

It’s a nice, quiet Sunday morning in the Picklefish office. I’m enjoying the fevered debate in the comments on yesterday’s re-post of #138about how long it takes to boil an egg. I’ve got my dark roast in my favorite mug and my CK2 is purring like a kitten. Yes, I hear you on the grammar in the tag line (“calves/halves”) and the not super-ambitious promise on pain reduction (50%). But I tell you, this thing is over-delivering. I feel like I could run a marathon. Anyway, I thought we’d have something official today, but Artie sent this from Scottsdale where he’s laying over on the way back from Mexico & catching the end of the Cactus League season. But he said not to bother sending it to the Committee. It’s a non-starter with the symbol swear. The sponsors don’t like the swearing. Even symbol swearing. So there’s a rule now against it that the Committee put in after the panel Artie did about the karaoke incident at RockBox where Syd brought the house down with her version of ‘I Will Survive’ & then accidentally walked off with someone else’s purse. I always thought that one was pretty funny, but Artie wouldn’t re-work it without the symbol swears and no one else had any alternative suggestions. So it’s in the Non-Canon/Rejected file with about a hundred others that Artie can do whatever he wants with, but only after a five-year waiting period, & as long as it’s under a different brand name. Inky inked it for posterity. He’s been trying to convince Artie to put out a book called ‘Arthur Trope’s Rejection Collection’ some day. It wouldn’t be a bad collection, really. There’s some good stuff in there that just doesn’t comply with SynrSys brand guidelines. Like this one, which combines Artie’s love of #baseball & disdain for authority. Not to mention his stubbornness, bc there’s probably a hundred other captions you could come up with to comply with the rules, but he won’t do it. So this one will join the non-canon/rejects, and stay there, on the outside, looking in, unless Inky has his way. -Ed.